I never thought I’d see the beauty of our world from a helicopter. I was just too fat. But I persisted. City after city, I pursued tour listings, hoping one day I’d find a company that could make it work. The day came, and I overcame my fear of heights and soared above Niagara Falls with the propellers roaring in my ears.
And I deserved it.
“Take the space you need and take the time you need,” says Carlisa Johnson, a journalist from Atlanta. “While requesting accommodations may make you feel like a burden, you are paying money just like everyone else and deserve the same levels of comfort. Arriving early for travel, excursions and events ensures you have time to get all you need to truly enjoy yourself and feel comfortable.”
Whether you are a fat person planning your dream vacation, someone who loves fat people or just someone who travels a lot for work, these tips will help make life easier once you get on the ground.
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Google is your best friend
No matter where you’re traveling or how big you are, you’re going to use Google to research.
What to look for:
- Photos of seating in restaurants, on tours and more.
- Photos of the activity (and the size of people doing it).
- Answers to specific questions about weight limits.
- Reviews by other bigger people (on Google, Yelp, Tripadvisor).
- Details about the experiences you’re considering.
Restaurants, especially in certain parts of the world, may not have chairs comfortable enough for fat people, and in some cases, they can’t sit on them at all. “I look at the images available to ensure there are seats available that don’t have armrests,” Johnson says.
Reviews can also help you suss out whether other people of size had positive experiences. “I’ve started to use an app called Friendly Like Me, which is dedicated to capturing reviews – from people of all sizes and abilities – on whether or not a business is fat-friendly and size-accessible,” says Jae’lynn Chaney, a plus-size travel influencer from Vancouver, Washington.
The more information you have about any given city, restaurant, tour or experience, the more likely it will be a positive one.
Read tour listings carefully
Tour listings can be confusing – but they are crucial in determining whether an activity or tour is a good fit for your body and abilities. Be sure to read every part of the tour listing, as well as the tour companies’ FAQ, if they are available. You’re looking for information on accessibility, whatever that looks like for your size and ability level. Check for weight limitations, any notes on the size of safety equipment (like wetsuits), and even for things like walking distance on a tour or excursion.
If weight limits aren’t listed but you’re looking into an activity that you believe might have one, it would be worth a call into the tour operator to double-check. Email also works if calling isn’t something you’re comfortable with. Detailed descriptions and reviews can help you notice things about the tour or experience that you wouldn’t have even thought of as a problem.
Leave a note when you make reservations
Sometimes restaurants will have mixed seating: armchairs, regular chairs, or maybe a booth or bench seating. Some of those options might not work for your body. If you’re making a reservation for a restaurant that’s likely to be busy, or you simply don’t know, it’s worth it to make a note in the reservation. You could call, but I find that leaving a note will remind the hosts on the day of – just to be on the safe side.
Sometimes you’ll end up in a restaurant without a reservation, and without a plan. “If the chairs are uncomfortable and perhaps have armrests, I will politely ask if there are any other seats available that I can have, and most of the time, the staff will have no issue finding a different type of seat for me,” Chaney says. “As someone who uses a wheelchair, if there are absolutely no other options for seats that accommodate my body properly, I will opt to bring my wheelchair inside the restaurant and sit in that when possible.”
Consider the parking situation
If a restaurant or experience is fat-friendly, don’t forget to check the parking.
I vividly remember realizing that a restaurant I had reservations for was in the heart of a busy casino on the strip. Between the trek out of my casino hotel, out of the parking lot to the Uber pickup and into the restaurant, I was wiped out and wished I never made the reservation.
“Is there close and accessible parking? Will I have to walk a mile before getting to the entrance? Because if so, that’s not a place I’d consider fat-friendly,” Chaney says.
Arrive early
It’s much easier to request accommodations or to figure out if things fit when you aren’t running late or surrounded by other people joining you on the tour or experience.
Have a backup plan
I make a list of things that I want to see or do but don’t quite work into my itinerary. That’s so if anything goes awry, I don’t have to start researching – I can just pick something I already wanted to do off my list and continue with my day.
“When I realize I can’t fit into something, I try to make the best of a bad situation and find an alternative for myself to ensure that those who still wish to take part in the attraction or excursion can do so,” Johnson says.
Remind others that you need space
“I travel for work, and quite often co-workers may want to take an UberX or a smaller car, but I stand firm and remind them that we need more space to accommodate my body,” Johnson says. Telling people you need certain accommodations to travel or enjoy an activity can be embarrassing, but it’s also empowering. It gets easier with practice.
“Advocate for yourself and ask for the things you need because, at the end of the day, we only get one life to live, and we ought to make the most out of it,” Chaney said. “There were many times in my life when I chose to stay silent and not ask for the things that I needed, and that just made me uncomfortable in those situations.”
Pay it forward
Traveling while fat means a lot of advocating for yourself. And that advocating doesn’t come easily to everyone. “I like to educate people whenever I can because I see it as a way to ‘pay it forward,’ since that person might use that knowledge to help another person feel more comfortable,” Chaney says.
Traveling while fat is complicated. It’s difficult. And it’s totally worth it. But, at the end of the day we want to pave the path for others so it’s not as hard for them as it is for us.